By Paul Salfen, Christine Thompson for AMFM Magazine
In a cozy corner of their family-owned Legacy Wire Products facility in DeSoto, Texas—amid the hum of a company Christmas party complete with mechanical bulls and ponies for the kids—Carla Ondrasik and her husband, Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter John Ondrasik (better known as Five for Fighting), sat down with AMFM Magazine’s Paul Salfen. The occasion? The release of Carla’s debut book, Stop Trying!: The Life-Transforming Power of Trying Less and Doing More (Post Hill Press), a no-nonsense manifesto that’s already climbed Amazon charts as a #1 bestseller in Personal Transformation and Self-Help categories.
At 61, Carla—former Vice President of Creative Writer Development at EMI Music Publishing, where she worked with icons like Barbra Streisand, Mariah Carey, Cher, and Christina Aguilera—is stepping into the spotlight herself. And she’s doing it with the same decisive mindset she preaches: no trying, just doing. “I see people trying everywhere, especially the younger generation,” Carla says. “With one push of a button, everything arrives at your door. We’re losing that elbow grease, that hard work.”
The book’s core philosophy is simple yet revolutionary: eliminate the word “try” from your vocabulary. As Carla explains, backed by neuroscience and positive psychology, “trying” primes your brain for half-hearted effort—a low hum of dopamine that never fully ignites action. “When you say ‘I’m doing this,’ your brain lights up differently. It says, ‘Okay, what’s next?'” It’s a message that’s resonated deeply, earning endorsements from Mel Robbins (“This book is the change”), Paula Abdul, Suneel Gupta, and Gary Sinise.
John, the platinum-selling artist behind anthems like “Superman (It’s Not Easy)” and “100 Years,” beams with pride as his wife of 28 years takes center stage. “She’s always been the starmaker,” he says, recalling how Carla discovered him playing in a near-empty Los Angeles coffeehouse back in the day. She signed him, developed his career, and built a life together that’s equal parts power couple and family affair. Their son runs the Texas branch of the family business (makers of the “best shopping cart in the world,” founded in 1946), and their daughter, Olivia, tours as opener for Five for Fighting with her band Lace and Lee.
The Ondrasiks embody their message. Carla arrived in L.A. at 17 with just a suitcase and backpack, clawing her way to the top of the music industry without a safety net. John balanced superstardom with grounding shifts at the family wire factory. “There was no ‘try’ about it,” John notes. He shares a vivid “do or die” moment: performing “Superman” at the Concert for New York post-9/11, deafened by sudden white noise in his in-ears, yet powering through because, as he puts it, “You just do it. You take a swing.”
For New Year’s resolutions? Forget vague promises. Carla’s advice: “The only resolution you need is to stop trying.” Ask yourself why you’ve been “trying” to lose weight or limit screen time—is it fear of failure or success? Then commit: do it, or don’t. Saying “no” decisively, she adds, is its own act of kindness—and power. John echoes this for aspiring artists: “Dive into the deep end. Start with realistic goals, like booking a coffeehouse gig, and build from there.”
As AI reshapes creativity, the couple remains optimistic about human connection. “Nobody wants to watch a laptop do a concert,” John laughs. Live music, real conversations—these are irreplaceable. Carla uses tools like ChatGPT for research but insists the heart of creation is human.
Looking ahead, John’s gearing up for 2026 touring, kicking off with rare Hawaii shows in February (his first there in over a decade), followed by more dates with new songs in the works. Carla? She’s already mulling a children’s book to nip “trying” in the bud—kids don’t say “try” until around age two, when fear of judgment creeps in.
In an era of endless scrolling and half-hearted attempts, the Ondrasiks offer a refreshing antidote: commitment, preparation, and fun. “Have fun with it,” John urges. “Don’t take yourself so seriously.” As Carla puts it, her goal is simple: “Eliminate regret. Help people become conscious of what’s holding them back so they can stop holding themselves back.”
Stop Trying! is available now on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and wherever books are sold. Follow Carla daily on Instagram @carlaondrasik for “No Try” reminders, and check stop-trying.com for events. For Five for Fighting tour updates, visit fiveforfighting.com.
In the words of the Ondrasiks: Don’t try to read this book. Just do it. Your future self will thank you.
